From Mary, 43…
When we met to pray, all I could focus on was the intense pain radiating from the center of my stomach.
Catherine asked me if there was anything I was feeling angry about. Yes, I was extremely angry with the doctors for misdiagnosing my condition, and then giving me a treatment that destroyed my intestines – which caused the pain I was having now.
As I thought about how much pain I was in and how angry I felt, we asked God to reveal a time where I felt this way before. I remembered when I was in my early 20s. I was in a long-term relationship with a man who was really mean to me. He acted like he couldn’t stand being around me and would leave for long periods of time without telling me where he was going. I would be frantic with worry. I remember one time sitting by the phone, curled up in a ball. I was having a mental breakdown and was not able to function for hours. It was horrible.
I was having a hard time connecting with God, so we asked him if there was a time before this that he wanted me to remember. I thought about myself as a baby. (The last time I prayed with Catherine this same baby-memory came up.) This time I saw Jesus pick me up. He told me that there was nothing I could ever do to make him reject me. I thought of the scripture, Jeremiah 29:11, which says, “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” He also told me that he wants me to know who I am from birth, and he wants to restore my identity in him.
We asked God how he felt about me. I saw him proudly holding me and smiling tenderly. This reminded me of my brother who is a very caring person. I was really thankful to God for giving me such a loving brother.
We then asked God what my life would look like if I let him restore my identity in him. He reminded me about a song that I love called, “Take Me Into The Beautiful”. I felt like he was saying that this song was part of my inheritance and that my future path is lined with the beautiful words and melody of this song. (To hear this song, click on the link below.)
We asked God if there was anything in the way of me receiving this inheritance. A certain woman came to mind who had been extremely judgmental toward me. I broke the agreement I had made with her judgment. I forgave her and released her from having to make it up to me. God said he would make it up to me by giving me the beautiful inheritance he had for me. I felt really loved.
We went back to the memory of me having a breakdown by the phone. I was now able to connect with God. I saw him cover me with a red and white blanket. It made me feel healed by his love. My stomach actually felt better!
To hear the song, Take Me Into The Beautiful by Cloverton, click on the link below:
If Mary’s story brought something to mind in your life that you would like help with, please email firstname.lastname@example.org to schedule your own appointment for emotional renovation.
This story is true and was posted with permission. The names were changed to ensure privacy.