I was feeling like a total failure as a wife and mother – as a person.
The first thing Catherine and I did at my Emotional Renovation session was to ask God what he wanted to do for me. I heard him say that he wanted to wash away years of pain.
We asked God when I first felt like such a failure. I remember a time when I was in first grade. I had head lice and was being ridiculed by some of the girls in my class. They were circling me and pointing. The teacher did nothing. I felt rejected, humiliated, unprotected, and I knew everyone else was better than me – that I was disgusting.
We invited Jesus into that terrible moment. I saw him stand between me and the girls. It was clear to me that he was not okay with me being treated this way. He picked me up and held me. I felt embraced in his love and acceptance. I felt protected.
I forgave my classmates and teacher. I broke the agreement I had made with the self-hatred I’ve been carrying around since then.
Another memory surfaced: I was in third grade and was having a really hard time learning how to tell time. I felt totally stupid. It was extremely frustrating for me. My parents were not able to help me overcome this challenge. I believed that not only was I stupid, but my whole family was, too.
When God showed up for me in this memory, it was as if a big light revealed the whole picture. He reminded me that I did learn to tell time that year and then went on to excel in school. I won a number of awards in academics over the next few years. While God was telling me that I wasn’t stupid, I felt a beautiful connection to him. I could see glittering light from Heaven fall gently on my head. It was as if I were being adorned with a shining tiara that made me feel like a graceful princess. It was the complete opposite of how I felt when we started our session. What a wonderful feeling!
This story is true and was posted with permission. The names were changed to ensure privacy.
If this story brought something to mind in your life that you would like help with, please email email@example.com to schedule your own appointment for emotional renovation.